Sunday, June 28, 2009

In my neighbourhood there is a Kentucky Fried Chicken, or KFC as the kids say. I am not annoyed by the presence of the KFC. Just heading that one off at the pass if you thought that was where I was going. In fact, I quite enjoy the nightly aroma as it wafts through the neighbourhood. Not to mention the glow of the bucket on the cold winter nights. It's quite festive.

No, what annoys me is not the KFC, but the customers. Not all of the customers, just some of them. I must admit that I do not know if the behaviours I am going to rant against are exclusive to KFC clientele. Please send in your own evidence if you know of such goings on in other locations.

So here's the deal. At this particular KFC, there is no parking (legal anyway) right by the actual entrance (in fact now that I think about it, this KFC doesn't even have a handicapped parking space). There is plenty of parking out behind the restaurant. The distance from these spots to the door is 60-100 feet or for you youngsters out there it is about 25 metres. The area right around the chicken outlet clearly has "no parking" marked on the ground and in some spots on the walls, yet many of the customers park in these no parking areas to go in to get their chicken. The thought of walking an extra 25 metres is just too much, which given the contents of a KFC dinner makes this crime of laziness all the worse.

To top matters off, some of these lazy people (and I've seen that they can walk without any noticeable limps or other pain) also leave the car idling. And not because it is cold out! Call me crazy, but that's annoying.

I don't often patronize the local KFC, but when I do it is often to make a very small purchase. If I'm making mash potatoes for dinner, I'll sometimes run over to the KFC and purchase a small gravy for me and the missus. The kids don't like gravy, so the small individual gravy that is about a buck, does the trick. That's my entire order. Usually gets a chuckle or at least a grin from the KFC employees. I think I might be known to them as "Gravy Man".


  1. Was the KFC there before you moved in, "Gravy Man"? Oh go Garmin/Slipstream and especially Ryder in the T de F. Cheers, xelA.

  2. The KFC has been in that spot since at least 1970. That's way back when I was just a youngster. We called it Colonel Saunders' Kentucky Fried Chicken back then. Everyone is in such a hurry these days! TTFN.

  3. "The thought of walking an extra 25 metres is just too much...."

    You answered your own question, Little Jackie Showers. The kind of customers who leave their card idling in a no-parking zone, to pick up a vat of deep-fried skin (let's face it, it's all about the crispy skin with 11 herbs and spices), are *likely* not the sort of people who are willing to walk 25 metres to get it. Nowadays, it's all about instant gratification!

    Having said that: Dean and I recently went into our neighbourhood KFC to pick up some chicken, on our way home after playing two sets of tennis. Our incongruous tennis attire did not go unnoticed by a couple waiting in line in front of us, who actually asked us what our story was (basically, the jist was, how could two people who EXERCISE, be patronizing a KFC?). Of course, we did drive there--and parked 10 feet from the door (in a "park all you want" area). And we turned off the engine too.

  4. But we totally would have skipped it if we'd had to walk 25 metres to the door.

  5. I love that you go to KFC and order one small container of gravy. Gravy Man, I think that's awesome. When I lived in Victoria, I would often call Domino's for one order of breadsticks (basically puffy breadsticks doused in olive oil and parmesan cheese and salt). In fact, I called them often enough that sometimes, upon seeing my number on call display, the clerk on duty would answer the phone with "Hello, Miss Parker, the usual? One order of breadsticks?" It was a little embarrassing, but any lingering sheepishness evaporated the second I bit into the first of those soft, warm, cheesy/greasy/salty little wonders. Maybe they even called me "Breadstick Lady". I'd have been honoured.