Okay, time for a real controversy. Enough of this lightweight stuff. An alert reader, Lisa, has identified an alarming new product. Alarming because it is sure to lead to much marital strife. She is concerned that her husband actually approves of the latest in brownie pans. See it here:
http://www.thinkgeek.com/homeoffice/kitchen/a1aa/?source=google_home_office&cpg=ogho1
Lisa says:
"I was horrified. What a wretched contraption. Everyone knows that the lovely, soft, gooey inside pieces are where it's at. Who wants a hard crispy overcooked outside edge? That's the bottom of the barrel (or the sides, as the case may be). If there was an invention that rendered all bread slices as crusts, who would want such a thing? Maybe 1% of the population? The crazy 1%, that is."
I leave this one open for discussion.
Speaking of crispy overcooked edges, one of my favourite such stories is of a teacher I worked with who decided to be really keen and bake some bread with his elementary class. Well, teaching in elementary can really demand your full attention and sometimes you can forget about things such as the bread you put in the oven awhile back. He remembered it all right when the fire alarm went off and the school was evacuated. Now that was some hard crispy bread.
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We are supposed to live in a pluralistic society, a so-called cultural mosaic. Don't try to dictate to the crazy one percent what they may or may not do with their brownies.
ReplyDeleteOf course, if that crazy one percent tries to foist their wares upon we, the sane 99 percent, well, then we've got ourselves an issue worth debating...
oops...that should read "upon US, the sane 99 percent..." Us being the object of the preposition and all...
ReplyDeleteMy bad.
So Lisa doesn't like a brownie pan because she doesn't like the edges? So don't buy the product. It's not like they're replacing all brownie pans with the serpentine one.
ReplyDeleteI might buy the new pan cause it looks like a letter "M" :-) but use for banana bread only. I will keep my brownies fudgey!!
ReplyDeleteHey now, let's not pick on Lisa. She is but the voice for 99% of society. A voice that deserves to be heard. Don't shoot the messenger.
ReplyDeleteMody, you could call that bread, Bamama bread.
Dan said: "Don't try to dictate to the crazy one percent what they may or may not do with their brownies."
ReplyDeleteI prefer the term "Freedom of Speech". Admit it, many of us who follow this blog love being opinionated, strong-minded windbags!
Also, I feel I must overstate my case, as such a contraption could very well cause much marital strife. We only argue about such weighty, profound issues as brownie pans!
ReplyDeleteI like reading what opinionated, strong-minded windbags say. But I have gone as mushy as bamamas this year of pre-50. Dan, got any tips looking back to 49?
ReplyDeleteHey! How come my profile picture doesn't show???
ReplyDeleteI have no idea what you are talking about Mody.
ReplyDeleteLisa brings up a good counter point to Guy's statement that if she doesn't like it she doesn't have to buy it. In a marraige it is likely that you are going to have one brownie pan or at least use only one brownie pan at a time, so if one person wants the new fangled pan and the other one doesn't well then this invention could be a threat to those who disapprove.
ReplyDeleteNot only that but it is clearly unfair. With a traditional brownie pan with the brownies cut in squares in a 6 by 6 pattern there will be 36 brownies. Of these 20 will feature at least one outside crispy edge. Clearly enough for the crispy fans. On the other hand the new pan features crisp bits on every piece and no uncrispy ones. Cleary an imbalance.
Simply solved: Whoever makes the brownies picks the pan.
ReplyDeleteNo muss, no fuss.
I will not let up on Lisa. Are you trying to tell me, Showers, that if one spouse bought a serpentine brownie pan, they'd come home and throw out the regular pan, which can also be used for other things? Gimme a break. There is no issue here. Please do not stoop so low again in choosing a blog entry.
ReplyDeleteWhere did I say anything about throwing out any pan. I just said if you are part of a couple (or a family for that matter) and you make brownies with the serpentine brownie pan then you are completely excluding the desires of the Chewies. The Crunchies get 100% of what they want and the Chewies are left disappointed. Even with a traditional brownie pan as I outlined above, the Crunchies get more than their share, so why do they now need to have things even more their way. This is clearly a case of giving them an inch and they're trying to take a mile.
ReplyDeleteI do not really care much about whether my brownies are crunchy or chewy, but damn if I'm going to stand by and let an injustice like this go unchallenged. You are in denial MacPherson about the seriousness of this issue. You've got your head buried in the batter!
Again, I posit the most simple of solutions. If you want chewie brownies, you make 'em they way you like 'em. If spousal units want 'em crunchie, they know what to do. If they don't know how to do it, and rely entirely on spousal units to make brownies, they deserve whatever they get, and can't whine or winge about it.
ReplyDeleteWow, Dan Jardine as the voice of reason! Impressive! Yes, Dan nails it on the head. Hits it out of the park. Exactly. This topic is not worthy of Jack's otherwise excellent blog.
ReplyDeleteSeriously, they're brownies, for the love of God. I can see someone having a preference of either crunchy or chewy, but not to the extent that they'd hate the alternative. And if they did hate the alternative, they could make make a batch of their own. Or alternate. It's called compromise.
Man, get onto a new topic already. It's been over a week with this ridiculous post.